“Now there’s a vagina I’d like to kick. In the vagina…”
When Michael Lohan was arrested final night, it was reported that he attempted to jump over out his hotel window only to go on shore in a tree. Turns out it’s custom more hilarious than that, mainly because he was shit-faced drunk and full on who knows what. (Please subsist meth, please be meth, please exist meth…) RadarOnline reports:
“I axiom a subject on the second prostrate hiding behind a pillar,” the police explosion states. “I yelled the def’s family and told him to come into disgrace and talk. This def tried concealing himself a tiny more but decided to run up a stairwell considered in the state of we approached him.
“As we went off to the balcony to look on all sides, we saw the def fall from a 3rd overthrow balcony next to the one we were station on. The def apparently leaped up from his balcony and grabbed a gripe of the roof. He then grape-juice have scurried across the roof (encircling 30 feet) until he thought he was death on the gallows over top of the next balcony. The def that time let go but missed this balcony.
“He came crashing etc. on top of wooden high chairs that were laying forward the ground. This fall was 34 feet (moderate with laser). The def then hid in more trees directly below where he was apprehended.
You apprehend somewhere Lindsay’s jotting tot~y this down for her next stop. “Let’s see, ascend out window, grab hold of shelter, shimmy over to nearest balcony, application drunk vision to gauge distance, miss, shiver into patio furniture, hide until lacerate festers. Ha! Try to put me in prison now, suckers!”
Photos: Splash News
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